A Child's Heart

If any of you read my blog even somewhat regularly, you may know, or at least guess, that we are pursuing adoption.  We have not started the stacks of paperwork yet. No home study.  No background checks. Nothing yet. We have been waiting until my husband defends his dissertation (which he does on Monday . . . please say a prayer for him!).  But, there is a folder stacked with agency information.  Plans made. We are just waiting.

But, several weeks ago a possibility came our way.  An order of nuns we know has a mission a world away.  And at that mission they have been caring for twins for the past year.  Twins that have no mother.  They had been praying for the twins to be adopted.  And, friends that heard these prayers, thought of us.  When I was first told, I was excited.  I knew it was a long shot.  A real long shot.  But I know that we have a God that can move mountains.  That if He willed it, those twins would find a home with us.

The whole family was there when I was told of the twins.  Even my boys were excited.  They prayed each night that we could adopt these two boys who have no home.

But as the days went on, and many emails sent that did not get answered, I felt that it may not happen.  And after an email last week from the Provincial of the order in the US, I prepped the boys that it does not look like we will be able to adopt the twins.

And then the final email came last night.  Even though the twins have been in an orphanage for a year, they do have a father, and the father does not was them to be adopted.  I was a little sad, but, truthfully, my heart had given up hope two weeks ago. 

But a child's heart does not give up hope.  My oldest son was sitting at the top of the stairs when I told my husband the news.  He overheard the conversation.  And he started to cry.  My husband and I met him on the stairs.   My husband held him and J said, "I wanted to adopt the twins."  I began to cry.  Not because I was sad we could not adopt the twins, but I cried because of J's sadness. And the beauty of his heart.  Here is an 8 yr old that wants to be a brother to orphan twins a world away. Two boys that he does not even know. Boys that look different than him.  But, that does not matter to him.  He wanted to love them as the brothers that they would have become.

A little while later, my husband checked on J when he was back in bed.  J told my husband that he changed his mind about his Christmas list.  A Christmas list formed at the dinner table just hours before.

"I only want three things this year." He said.  "I want the Lego City Police Boat. A Lego tank and a Lego . . ."(well, I do not remember the third thing, but it was another Lego set.)

A typical 8 yr old boy's Christmas List. But it changed.

As he lay in bed, he told my husband.
"I am changing my Christmas list.  I only want one thing now.  I want to adopt twins."

If only we all had a child's heart.

Maybe more of the world's orphans would know what it is be loved.  More of the world's orphan's would find forever familes.

I think I may need to change my Christmas list too . . .